She's No Auntie!

Not so long ago I witnessed an amusing episode involving a rather thick waiter and a 60-something "glamour puss' wife of a golf club member.

The stylo-mylo madame, in tight pants and high heels, with hair bleached blond and red talons worthy of an Arabian falcon, was having a drink with a couple of lady friends when this waiter-boy walked by.

She dramatically clicked her fingers for attention and lo and behold, the nervous waiter (he must be new) turned around and innocently asked; "Yes Auntie?"

You could hear a pin drop. Flaming red lips quivering and eyes shooting daggers at the hapless boy, she hissed, "Apa auntie auntie??? Panggil Puan tau!" (loose translation: "Auntie my foot! Call me Madam!")

As the poor boy slunk away, I heard sniggers and guffaws from fellow members seated at nearby tables. I wasn't sure if it was in sympathy with the waiter or with our glamour girl.

I remember thinking the club management should be taken to task for such faux pas. Serving staff should be taught how to address members and guests properly because some people are such sticklers.

It doesn't do to address these folks with simplistic honorifics, especially if they are titleholders like Tan Sri or Datuk, or members of royalty like Tengku and such. You are just putting your head in a loop for not observing decorum.

Me, I don't care two hoots if they call me Auntie or even Mak Cik (Aunt). In fact, the whole lot of them call me Kak (Sis), which makes me feel odd because almost all of them are young enough to be my children.

However, they address Pak Abu with the honorific Encik (Sir) although one of the (former) waitresses whom we regarded with affection, used to call him Abah (Dad) in jest.

I am not easily offended by trivial things. I like those kids, by the way, and some of them are far away from home. One thing they know, I don't suffer fools gladly and that is enough to keep them on their toes.