Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Virgin Chicks

A news item in yesterday's Malay Mail, under "World Headlines" had me chuckling. It was about a restaurant in China, specialising in only virgin chickens.

The Tanniu Unmarried Chicken Restaurant in Haikou, capital of Hainan Province, purportedly served dishes cooked by using chicken whose 'dara'ness was absolute.

Restaurant owner Fu Chuanhai said he raised hens selected soon after they were born on a special farm. He swore that his hens had never even 'flirted' with a rooster!

This 'ayam dara' business really got to me. It is grossly unfair to deprive the chickens of the joys of flirting, let alone the flesh, just so we humans can enjoy their unsullied meat.

Imagine, those hapless virgins, raised in seclusion only to have their heads chopped off to fulfil our own insatiable demand for the 'clean and pure'.

Think about those pitiful roosters on Mr Fu's farm, drooling away at the sight of vestal virgins flapping about invitingly in their enclosures, with ferocious Fu patrolling the boundaries of his 'dara' brood.

Sadly enough, 'ayam kampung' no longer equates 'ayam dara' these days. Times must be so fast a-changing that the purity of village chicks is now questionable (err.. this may allude to more than just the fowl specie).

Not so long ago, I read about some Chinese restaurants in rural Selangor that employed delectable Chinese chicks from China to boost business.

But these were no ordinary birds. They were of the kind that could wreck your matrimonial bliss and cast you into an Ah Long's net.

As to whether they (the birds, not Ah Longs) were virginal or not, I am not privy to such information.

But the likelihood of them being 'untouched' is as good as saying Paris Hilton is a nun, awaiting anointment as Mother Teresa of the new millennium.

These chicks offered more than just waitressing service, much to the chagrin of Kuala Selangor's long-suffering housewives.

Apparently, their (mostly) fisherfolk husbands thronged such restaurants in droves to sample both 'ayam' offerings (the ones on the plates and the ones in miniskirts).

Aaaah.. men...! When will they ever learn to keep their pecker where it (rightfully) belongs.. *sigh"

13 comments:

MrsNordin said...

This is cute. Anything "virgin" will surely be in high demand and expensive. Like, EXTRA virgin olive oil ~ how is that possible?

Pi Bani said...

Aren't all the chicks (of whichever kind) two-legged?

Kama said...

Mrs N - I would like to know about this extra virgin thingy too.. I fread abt it somewhere,tapi dah lupa..

Pi - Ha'ah ekk.. I completely forgot both species are two-legged!

Tommy Yew said...

Oh Puteri, oh Puteri, only u could write such….errrr…tying the 2 ‘chicks’ together….hehehe…I suppose u won’t allow Pak Abu to go game hunting ‘ayam hutan’ with his golfing buddies.

Hey I know that Mr Fu fella, his friend Bu & Chu went to California, loved the place, opened Chinese takeaways & changed their name to Buck & Chuck, but Fu decide to go back to Hainan…..hahaha….

One day a bloke went to his Tanniu Unmarried Chicken restaurant & shouted to Mr.Fu;

“This virgin chicken is bloody rubbery,” to which Mr.Fu smilingly replies, “Thank you velly much.”

Cheers, u have a chickery day too.

Tommy
P/S - Now I'm feeling a wee bit peckish,..ermm..KFC??

VersedAnggerik said...

got hymen test arr for them chicks? hehehe.....

Ida Hariati Hashim said...

Sigh..kesian, nak jadi ayam pun susah. I wonder, are these people eating the flesh of the chicken or some other parts? Kalau yang dara ada beza ke..kot pehanya pejal lagi ke?

Pi Bani said...

Oh btw, that restaurant serving only virgin chickens, do they serve "ayam dara tua", I wonder... Hehehe...

de minimis said...

I agree. I think roosters and chicks have the right to some "fun" too. I think there's too much obsession with virginity :D

Kak Teh said...

Puteri, coming from China, do you actually believe it is what actually itclaimed to be? The daraness could have been manufactured, no?

tireless mom said...

Is there such thing as Paws or SPCA for ayam dara only? They deserve it at that province.

mamasita said...

Sedapkan ker virgin chickens ni?

Whats the specialness?? Ni betul2 'virgin' question! haha

Oldstock said...

It must be chicken season, I'm sure of it. This is the third post in as many weeks that three different bloggers on my blogroll wrote about chickens.

I'm not sure whether the meat of ayam dara tastes better than those that are no longer virgins. But for sure, the eggs of the `experienced' chickens taste better than those coming from `untouched' ones. I'm talking about telur ayam kampung, of course.

Many years ago, I was having breakfast with some Chinese colleagues at a coffee shop in old Dungun town. My boss at the time, David Chong, ordered telur separuh masak and roti bakar. The shopowner asks, `Nok telur ayam kampung ke telur biase?'

David asks for telur ayam kampung.

A friend by the name of Ah Weng asks, `Any difference, ah?'

David replied, `Telur kampung is the egg that you get when the female chicken gets *ngap* by the male chicken. Telur biasa is eggs produced in farms by chickens who do nothing but eat, shit and lay eggs.'

I can still remember the blurr look on Ah Weng's face, heheheh.

Ok, enough of chicken stories. I'd better find a proper place to put my pecker... lest I get a stern lecture from Kak Aji Kama *winks*

Anonymous said...

Hey, I am checking this blog using the phone and this appears to be kind of odd. Thought you'd wish to know. This is a great write-up nevertheless, did not mess that up.

- David