Saturday, April 16, 2011

Amoi Oh Amoi....!

Before you begin, please be informed that this story has nothing to do with a certain amoi in a much talked-about sex tape. It's just another amoi, the homegrown kind and not your much-maligned (rightly so!) "China Doll" specie.



Day/Date/Time: This morning Venue: A bead shop in One Utama Shopping Complex Key Players: Makcik Kama and Amoi (thereafter referred to as MCK and Amoi [what else?] respectively).


MCK: G'Morning. I want to restring my beads.


(Of course that sounds pompous and rude; it should have been a more courteous "I would like to have my beads restrung, please." But imagine what kind of headache 'restrung' would have brought. As it were, MCK was already in for an interesting exchange with just plain 'string'... but MCK's well ahead of herself..)


Amoi: Aa'ah..?


MCK: I was here yesterday and spoke to an older woman. I told her I have a pearl necklace that I would like to restring into a bracelet, and she said to bring it on. So I have it with me today."


Amoi: "You mau aper...?"


MCK: "You tak paham itu English ka? Kalau saya cakap BM you tau ka? Ini saya ada satu necklace pearl punya, saya beli di Beijing. Tapi saya pakai tudung tak guna ada necklace, so saya mau buat bracelet. Sekarang you paham?"


Amoi: "Hor, hor, tapi saya tatau you mau aper. You tak suker ini design ker? Mau tukar aaa?"


MCK: [With a BIG sigh]..."Itu perempuan sikit tua semalam siapa? Saya ingat saya tunggu dialah lagi senang."


Amoi: "Itu boss hor. Dia nanti petang ader. You datang laterla haaa."


MCK: "Okay, thank you" (and took her leave double-quick before angin puspus arrived).


NOTE: What on earth did these people learn in school for (at least) 11 years when each of those years involved English as a core subject?



20 comments:

Oldstock said...

Err... just one question. Amoi tu lawa tak?

Hehehe.... saja nak bagi Kak Kama naik angin...

Kama At-Tarawis said...

Compared to what/who, oldstock? Hehehe... Not too bad looking la, actually.. tapi BM pun as senget as English.. I think ni product vernacular school lah ni..

GUiKP said...

occasionally you heard that rubbish in public universities too

HHalem said...

Satu lagi contoh kegagalan sistem pendidikan. Langit x sampai, bumi x sampai. Tergantung.

Setiap pusingan dasar....but then on the second thought, nobody is perfect.

Mama Huptihup said...

hahaha mmg sungguh pun ramai yg macam ni...sakit jiwa...

Kak Ezza@makcik blogger said...

kak
my angin pun naik kak..kalau saya tu saya cakap jerman jer kat dia...

koolmokcikZ said...

gulpp!

cikgu BI pun tak reti nak cakap camana ...

sering, keputusan peperiksaan yang cemerlang dicemarkan oleh subjek penggagal iaitu BI

pun, apa nak dikata bila subjek BI tidak wajib lulus

begitu, jika dilihat pada subjek BM yang WAJIB lulus, macamana pulak bila bebudak nih boleh dapat keputusan baik untuk subjek BM dalam peperiksaan tapi masih tidak boleh bercakap BM dengan baik di luar bilik darjah?

tireless mom said...

So blur one! Dia sibuk ngorat Achong at school so tak belajar apa apa.

AnnoyinglyAnonymous-LemanPulut said...

Kama,

Jenjangan bukan sebab amoi tu tak. Jenjangan Kak Kama cakap omputih queen's english selanga west-end cockney. Kok camtu jangankan amoi tukang tusuk benang, leman sendiri pun kok dengar tentu leman punya tulang som som terencat.

Leman

Kama At-Tarawis said...

GUiP, MamaHup, TM - something is definitely wrong with our edu system i think. cara engajar ker, apa ker, entahlah.. kalau tidak takkanlah for decades this kind of problem still persist..

Halem - actually i dont even mind manglish, it's the lack of comprehension that annoys me marah..

Ezza - hehehe, i no longer remember how to string a sentence in german. dah lama sangat tinggal, sekarang dah berkarat.

KoolM - but this is so true, KM. some excel when it comes to writing, bab oral hancoq.

Leman- takdernya.. cakap macam biasa, dah memang da blur sotong kot..

Wan Sharif said...

Now that the title has been changed to MC... maybe it is time not to entertain too much that angin puspus ;)

Kama At-Tarawis said...

hehehe, ayohwang... MC tu can also be MC Hammer..LOL.. bekeng weh..

Kak Ezza@makcik blogger said...

kak
my version german tu Jowo laa

Kama At-Tarawis said...

ezza - laaaa.. LOL... mati2 ingat zah boleh cakap Jerman!

kassim.ahmad said...

putri, i think it's bad form to comment on these salesgirls. of course they're stupid, (if not, you'd be serving them!) or heaven forbid, they'd become pr consultants. hax3

this reminded me of the advice i gave to a datin who can't quite grasped the concept of 'don't criticise those who handle your food' for you might get their spit in them.

Kama At-Tarawis said...

kassim - point taken. tq.

Naz said...

Kak Puteri,
(tertinggal keretapi...hari ni baru sampai!)

Yes, you can begin to wonder, how on earth did they manage to get through compulsory school. I taught three Remove classes many years ago and until today, I could not for the life of me figure out how they got through UPSR when 70% of them could not even read nor write!

What GuiKP wrote tu memang betul. Bukan saja di kalangan pelajar tetapi juga di kalangan tenaga pengajar :(

ninotaziz said...

I am still giggling away. What's the shop? I will try my so so Cantonese and French if I ever pass by! Ayoh Wang can join me too! His French is much more relentless!

Kama At-Tarawis said...

naz - i know of a teacher friend (who teaches english in a secondary school), who admits to feeling inadequate because she knows her command of the language isn't strong enough. what happened along the way to have come to this unbelieveable level?

ninot - thr shop is on the basement LG floor of one utama old wing, next to that popular karipap shop ' old chang kee' and a few steps away from mcD & KFC.

anti bohmau said...

kama,

tis the kind of school leavers who left school too early, i guess! even when at school they didnt learn anything worthwhile!

yesterday my friend's wife, an english teacher had a row with one of her students after she caught her having an earphone connected to Ipod under her veil while she's trying hard to make them understand what the themes for the poem 'nature' are all about!!

..and many girl students nowadays! they really have no shame!

*ntah2 dia ni pendatang dari tanah besar tak?